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My younger sister who had always been at home would be pursuing her studies. And that meant to leave Mom home, alone. Of course Dad would be around, but our village’s administrations and school teachings would sometimes consume him. I worried that the stillness atmosphere would remind her about the memories she shared with her late son.
Every semester breaks, Mom would talk about him. It had been hard for all of us, and even harder for her. One year felt like yesterday. This holiday, however, she talked less about him. I was relieved thinking that she had overcome the poignant tragedy. Till one day, when I told her I wanted to ‘burn’ rubbish.
She went out in rush and prepared something. She told me things were ready. I was wondering whether she really heard me.
It was a statement and, I didn’t ask her to do anything. I was confused a bit, but she handed me the fish tray and all. She misheard that I wanted to grill the fish. And that made me anxious. Big time.
I still remember how she told me that Bang Mad (my late brother) had once requested to grill his favourite fish. Yet, my parents couldn’t find the fish anywhere at market. What a coincidence. And It happened a day before the very day. We believed that once a person has destined for death, there were things that were not granted anymore. It was completely closed.
And her actions of preparing the stuff for grilling made me feel sad. As if Mom wanted to redeem something that wasn’t her fault, after all. She looked satisfied, though, and we enjoyed the meals together.
Redemption is a novel by Tariq Ali
My brother insisted me to join this Multi Level Marketing (MLM). Well, to be honest, am a bit pessimistic when it comes to all kind of MLM, where you need to find people and all that. It’s not because I don’t give a trust, but I know very well that I am not somebody who is good at persuading people. I tend to get mad if people don’t buy my stuff after giving them good speech. I distrust myself!
However, thinking that this programme has something to do with education, which is my field, I would like to give it a try. Still, am still doubting of withdrawing my money to buy the package which would cost me 1K++. So, my brother, again, will be sending me to KL for a overall states-talking course, to actually ‘convince’ me – and it is going to be few days before am going back to Sabah!
Although the system is good (where children go to a website and do their exercises), the payment is too pricey for ordinary parents. As somebody who keen to webmastering, I find it’s just, too much – and it has its limited period. Something like top-up system. If the students go surfing, they’ll do the works half halfheartedly and hurriedly because they want to continue playing games and facebook. As a teacher myself, I encouraged home-tuition. People from this so-called MLM academic marketing might say that you would waste more money and time – but let’s get back to basic.. If you love your children, you would give the best wouldn’t you?
My hard feels heavy you see. I’m in dilemma either to do this for my brother although I know I have no heart of doing the business. I know that am not that type of person who are good at persuading (read: forcing) people to buy the academic package thinking that it’s just way too expensive for a software. This is just way too risky. And I know, for sure, it’s a huge risk for me.
Surprising as it is, I’m more than excited. Not to hear the programme, but to meet new people! I always look forward to all kinds of workshops, just to meet new people! It has been my goal. Thinking that I’m not somebody who simply accept things, I will also be preparing some really difficult questions for them to answer.
I didn’t go. Dad said there’s too much hassle in changing the flight tickets. I thanked GOD the whole night. And fews days later, I went back to Sabah happily – without the burden of having to sell those items.
TRADER is a novel by Charles de Lint
Those days I always dreamt of becoming a writer. And usually, every writer has their own nickname. So, I always thought of using ‘AdamDaniel’ as mine. I just loved the name Adam and Daniel because it represented universality of names of Messengers in Islam and Christian.
As a matter of fact, in a magazine’s editorial, I put my name as AdamDaniel. Coincidently, my brother and sister who happened to deliver their babies used the name. Both of them used the name without discussing with me and with themselves. By saying themselves, I want you to see this:
1. Adam Haris
2. Haris Daniel
They both have ‘Haris’ in their name, like I said, without having a mutual agreement whatsoever. It just happened, and we avoid calling the babies Haris because we would get confused.So, we called Adam and Daniel, which indirectly reminded me of my favourite names! And I just love both of them so much.
Out of the blue, I gave a thought about names that I would give to my children soon. I could only think of Yusuf and Aisyah. Both historical personalities have looks and hearts (Faith). Thus, it makes the person complete.
NATIVE SON is a novel by Richard Wright
I will be teaching in all-boys school at La Salle, Tg Aru. Instead of feeling nervous, I feel excited. Compare to co-ed and convent school, I feel a great relief to be teaching at this school. At least I don’t have to prepare much mentally and physically. I can simply be myself, because I have this preconceive idea that these boys, like any other boys, hardly judge their male peers, or teachers.
Girls don’t judge either, only that I’ll be the one who will be judging them in sense of their learning styles. I’m afraid that I might hurt any of them unconsciously because some of my girl-friends have called me harsh (when I thought I’ve been sweet enough to them!) I also have this belief that girls, although can be very smart, are shy at the same time (and I don’t know how to make them speak).
Moreover, from my teaching experiences at a tuition centre, I realized that boys had tendency to speak more if they’re sitting with themselves. If there were girls in their group, these girls would be some kind of barriers for them to speak out (Girls’ power?). Perhaps they were afraid to make mistakes as it would degrade their intelligence in front of the girls (ego matters).
I only want my students to talk (with me), no matter how wrong their pronunciations and grammars are. I want to be friend them so that it’s easier for me to understand and relate to them. I want to know whether the conventional teachings only benefit the girls, or it’s because their attitude that prevent them from succeed in studies. I hope it’s not wrong to make them my guinea pigs.
FEAR is a novel by L. Ron Hubbard
I was actually nervous about my practicum. I tried to prepare things in advance. Physically, for example, I have made 30 copies of passport sized photographs. I repeat, 30 copies! However, it actually came in a package. I got it for only RM7. I repeat, RM7! Compare to your 4 copies of RM6-8, I think it’s just worth it. I had them all printed on gloss paper at Mutiara Cybercafe at Section 2, Shah Alam.
The quality is up to standard of laser printing. Unless I’m attending a model institute, I don’t need the grand copies. I know for sure that most of our documents will be thrown away (or lost) by times, and the price we pay will be a waste.
And I’ve prepared the necessary documents for re-registration. This time I don’t bring any reward certificates to be proud of, as they will only look at our personal documents. When it comes to attire, I only borrow my brothers’. I don’t feel like buying another pair of shirts or slack pants (I don’t have good taste of fashion, anyway).
Mentally, I send some messages to my seniors asking about their experiences at school. Most of them shared beneficial stuff with me. Still, I don’t know what to expect when I go to school. At the beginning, I think I will follow their advice but later I think I need to conceptualize my own. They seem contented with their teaching trials, so I hope it’s not going to be a big deal for me.
MISSION EARTH is a novel by L. Ron Hubbard
I went to visit my untie today. By chance, my cousin was there as well. But she had to go back to her university as they would be having 1-week English course. UUM had invited native-speaker teachers from Sweden to organize the course. And I was thinking that I’d be going to be an English teacher soon. And we never had been trained by any native lecturers at UiTM, while these people who took the course that had nothing to do with English subject (in specific) had had the opportunities to learn from them.
The other day I read a newspaper article that Government will be hiring English teachers from overseas for schools. Mom told me that during her time, they had been taught by native speakers. She said it was so fun and nothing to what we predicted as stressful. These teachers I believe have been trained to use the best method of teachings, which are relaxing and meaningful.
Why didn’t Govt hire English lecturers instead? The teacher trainees like us need to be taught by these native speakers and only then we would really master the language and its methodologies. If it was not so, trust me, some of us would have the capability as equal or slightly higher to secondary school students. It’s true when our lecturers said those who taught in university, sometimes, have never taught at schools! (and they’re teaching us to be teachers?)
ON THE ROAD is a novel by Jack Kerouac
Whenever I went to fastfood, I could see obese children eating the meals. Of course they looked adorable and happy, but wait till they become adults. The fats will become their flesh, it’s somehow hard to ‘melt’ them away. They would blame their parents for making them that way. So, I made promise to myself to never bring my children to these fastfood outlets.
My friend said that it would give some kind of craving when they get older. When we grown up, we don’t feel the tremendous urge. So I believe it’s effective to set up some alternatives. Having our own KFC at home, for example.
Still remembered that Mom usually cooked such chickens at home. They did have calories still, only that it’s healthier because we ate with lots of veggies. It had less fat, salt, and sugar because usually at the fastfoods outlets they are served with French fries and carbonated drinks.
I hope this is working and by then I need help to find a good wife who enjoys cooking and a health freak too. It feels like a sin when you feed the children with anything, the way you let your children become anything.
THE AGE OF INNOCENCE is a novel by Edith Wharton